Dr. B.A. Ferguson

So, in the absence of the world ending anytime soon, and since we need a little diversion, AND I'm feeling uncharacteristically sociable, this Saturday is Eurovision night.

Don't ask me how I know. I'd only lie.

Anyway, given the event and the circumstances, I'm holding a party at my place to which all are invited. There WILL be drinking games. I'll provide the alcohol, but you can all bring edibles with you if you think we'll need them.

By the way, I'm backing Serbia. The singer reminds me of Emma Bunton (shut the fuck up - I have a younger sister who adored the Spice Girls, okay?), so she's mine. I also recommend Germany and Italy - and Belgium if a capella swing is your thing (and they get through the second semi-final). UK too, but that's a given, even if they're not Scots.

Take a look at this, pick your song and I dunno... dress in the flag colours or some such shit. Videos might only be available on YouTube now. I won't be doing it with Serbia - have you seen just how fucking complicated their flag is? - but feel free.

Second semi-final's tonight. Turkey were damn well robbed on Tuesday, but you can't have everything.

What? It was a quiet night!

So yeah. Who's coming? I don't expect any of you are actually going to Düsseldorf to see it live, are you?

What the FUCK is going on around here? It's not April 1st yet, so I'd really appreciate somebody checking in who doesn't have some kind of medical or psychological issue going on right now. Because it DOESN'T happen to everyone, and certainly not this many simultaneously.

Is Kritiker/Weiss even functioning at the moment?

This does not make sense. And yes, that is my professional opinion.

I'm going to be on the road. I've heard from Pawn and she needs some kind of help, although I won't know what kind until I get there.

[Private to Bishop]
Pawn's telling me she can't see and that the last thing she DID see were the walls of her flat closing in on her. She told me she suffers from claustrophobia. She really seems in a bad way and I think the only thing I can do is drive out and see her. It won't take me too long to get there, but do you have any contacts in Paris who could call round in the meantime? I'd suggest it should be somebody Pawn knows as well.

I'll keep you updated.